Posted in Anxiety, Depression

“Why Do You Let Past Fears Control You?

Make them fears your bitch.

I love my sister and I know she didn’t mean to come from a hostile place, but this is something people who suffer from anxiety or depression deal with every day.

We constantly deal with people trying to tell us to “just get over it”. It’s like, “I never thought of that,” right? Just don’t let it affect you, pick yourself up by your bootstraps and move on, stronger than you were before. There lies the problem, however, I would give anything to not let anxiety or depression strike me in this way. To not feel like I can’t breathe, or like my heart is going to detach itself from my body and run out of my chest. To not get “over emotional” to jokes or “take things too seriously”. I would love to not have a dream and have it strike me to the core, making me afraid to wander through my own home, fearful that past demons would be just around the corner. I would give anything to not push my husband’s hand away on my bad days, because his touch reminds me of my dream I had the night before, and even though he’s never hurt me the way others have, my brain still connects a loving hand to a rapists.
People who suffer from anxiety or depression don’t choose to feel that panic or that constant “inability to breathe” feeling. We don’t get excited to share our fears with others, and would prefer to keep it to ourselves, let it fester until something “crazy” like suicide crosses our mind. The feelings, or in my case yesterday: rape memories, come back and fill your headspace with a darkness so thick, it makes you unable to stand.  Unable to think clearly. Unable to function.
We feel helpless. We feel alone. And comments like the one above only solidify it. They make us feel like we ARE crazy. Like there IS something wrong with us specifically and that others could never understand how we feel. If I hadn’t married the wonderful supportive man that I did, I know I would have followed through on some of my more darker thoughts.  I would have harmed myself in ways that I probably wouldn’t be alive today.

This is something people need to understand more. Not just post on social media about being available when a celebrity dies due to suicide when linked to depression. 

The mindset of “just get over it” needs to change.

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Author:

Blogger of personal health and well being. Also offers opinions, and written recaps to games played. Means well, willing to admit was wrong in most cases, :)

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